Saturday, August 6, 2011

Behind the mask

Masks.

Big colorful ones. Tiny demure ones. Sexy intriguing ones. Dark enveloping ones.

What happens when they come off? Who is that person behind it?

All my life, I've walked around thinking that masks are for cowards. For those who don't have the courage to let the people around see them for who they are. I kept letting people se through me. I made excuses for them when they hurt me. "Atleast I let them see the real me", I'd think.

The scars and the blows got bigger, my excuses got weaker. I tried, I swear I did - I hoped against hope that it'll all be okay. But it just got worse.

Till one day, a single blow brought me hurtling down. The excuses vanished and I just lay there, gasping for breath. Everything fell to pieces. It hurt so much that I stopped feeling it.

Nothing.

Zilch.

I stopped feeling the hurt. I just felt faintly bitter but I knew that if I had to survive, it would only be with a mask.

So here's my mask - one thats made of spunk, joy, being carefree - one that hides my vulnerability, stops me from telling someone what I feel, one that makes me feel powerful and strong when I'm behind it.

But tonight, its just me. No mask. No walls. Nothing to protect me.

Just me.

8 comments:

  1. Behave unto others how they behave unto you. You'll never get hurt that way.

    Take a break, let it all go, pamper yourself and come back refreshed. Or you might lose yourself in the misery.

    Feel better soon.
    xo

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  2. That’s a moment of self discovery, unearthing the real self… however almost always we are overshadowed by sham…

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  3. Its a nice feeling when you are just you without any pretensions.
    Take care and enjoy those moments.

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  4. The mask theory! Yes, tried and tested! :P

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  5. What a nice image - being true to yourself is incredibly sexy - in like so many ways. Thanks for this...

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  6. Pu, you should have a love button on blogger as well because i'm running out of things to say without repeating myself.

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  7. Aww Smit, thank you :) much love

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